Sex Therapy

Sex Therapy

Sex therapy differs little from traditional talk-based psychotherapy, except that the focus of the treatment is on solving sexual problems, and the sex therapist is a professional who is specially trained in the complex arena of human sexuality. And just like traditional psychotherapy, sex therapy involves no touching between patient and therapist and absolutely no sex between patient and therapist.

There is a significant distinction between a professional known as a sex surrogate, and a sex therapist. Unlike the sex therapist, the sex surrogate aids a patient in overcoming sexual challenges by actually engaging together with the patient in touching and sexual experiences.

How does sex therapy work? The traditional form of psychotherapy is effective in solving many sexual problems because emotions play a huge role in sexual functioning and experience, and by talking about the particular difficulties you have, your emotions are elicited, causing you to become more aware of how you function in different parts of your life, such as when you are being sexual with a loved one.

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Sexual problems are particularly difficult because of the embarrassing and taboo nature of sexuality. Commonly, sexual problems exist within the context of a relationship, so that a person’s partner is involved. It is said that sex is roughly five percent of a relationship, but when sex is a problem, it inflates to consume ninety percent of the relationship. When one or both partners in a relationship are sexually troubled, the impact of the problem snow-balls with the passage of time.

Beyond a purely biological need for reproduction, healthy and satisfying sexual play reduces tension, increases emotional intimacy, contributes to the feeling of connection and of being loved; the qualities that people most highly value in a love relationship. Without that, the connection between partners is reduced and sometimes lost.

When faced with a sexual problem, a person must first admit to the problem. In seeking help to correct it through sex therapy a person must acknowledge their own value. Having a sexual problem and fixing it is an opportunity to grow. Sex therapy is about helping people to grow to become more self aware and stronger.

Sexual problems are far more common than is widely believed.  Because for many sex is the source of shame and embarrassment, sexual-based problems are not talked about, so the exact frequency of problems is difficult to say.  Often men and women suffer in silence about obstacles to sexual success and satisfaction.

For a more detailed exploration of sexual problems, following the links at the top of the page to visit male and female sexual problems.


  • Lack of Sexual Desire
  • A Sexless Marriage or Relationship
  • Lack of Orgasm
  • Discomfort with Sex
  • Sexual inhibition
  • Ejaculatory Problems such as:
  • Lack of Ejaculatory Control
  • Inability to Reach Ejaculation
  • Erection Difficulties
  • Performance Anxiety
  • Arousal Difficulties
  • Painful Intercourse
  • Vaginismus (Difficulties with Penetration)
  • Lack of Sexual Pleasure
  • Sexual Avoidance
  • Poor Sexual Skills
  • Lack of Playfulness

Beyond good sex is great sex!

Many couples deeply enjoy sex, yet most far underestimate their sexual potential. Lovemaking has infinite dimensions. With specialized guidance the quality of your sex life may reach levels previously unimagined.  By expanding your awareness and deepening your capacity for deep relaxation the intensity, pleasure and connection within your sex play may achieve profound heights. Orgasms may be intensified, lengthened or multiplied. Excitement can be magnified while learning more about your partner than ever before.

     Unfortunately most couples accept poor quality sex because of barriers of fear, shame and lack of information.  By getting beyond these barriers, not only may you include better sex in your relationship, sex exploration is a pathway to tremendous personal growth.

Loving touch is essential for health, from infancy to aged.


  • SexSmart by Aline Zoldrob
  • The Erotic Mind by Jack Morin
  • For Yourself by Lonnie Barbach
  • The New Male Sexuality by Bernie Zilbergeld
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